moodymama's Diaryland Diary


Yes, I'm a flaky psycho after all.

Your True Sign Is Gemini



Never Boring

Fun and Friendly


Eternally Youthful

The Life of the Party

Intellectual and Witty

What's Your True Zodiac Sign? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life

(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Yay! Guess I'm a true Gemini after all. I was hoping I wouldn't get something like...Cancer or Taurus. :)

1:18 a.m. - Saturday, Jul. 31, 2004


I do need a job...

500 a night

You Would Make $500 a Night!

You won't have to resort to the streets to earn your cash...

But you will spend most of your time at a brothel on the wrong side of town!

How Much Could You Make as a Prostitute?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

Hrm. I should apply, eh?

1:03 a.m. - Saturday, Jul. 31, 2004


Change is good.

I love new templates. It's almost like getting a new pair of underwear.

12:17 a.m. - Saturday, Jul. 31, 2004


No pictures.

Crap, how could I have forgotten to mention the horrible, catastrophic news of yesterday?

I picked up the Hawaii pictures from S@ms yesterday. I didn't think to look at them before I dropped nearly thirty bucks on them. Got in the car with the kids and we excitedly tore through the envelopes. None of the pictures came out. NONE. They were all too blurry or had too much flash and you could only see a glimpse of how beautiful the pictures would have been. I almost cried when I saw the fuzzy pictures that we took with Mom on our last outting to the beach and on our last day together.

You can't recapture moments caught on film. It's not like I forgot something in Hawaii and can just call Mom and ask her to pick it up for me. Pictures are lost forever. The moments have passed. I don't know when I'll be able to see my Mom or go home again and so these pictures were especially meaningful. I was going to use some of them and make her a beautiful scrapbook album for Christmas. T and I had a blast there together and took many wonderful pictures with us and the kids. Gone. Just like that.

Damn, now I'm upset all over again about the stupid pictures. I'm going to soak in a bubble bath with Monkey.

12:12 p.m. - Thursday, Jul. 29, 2004


I'm moody today. Are you shocked?

If this wasn't such an easy and convenient way to connect with my friends, my real friends, I'd abandon this public journaling bullshit altogether.

I went to pick up my Rx from W@lgreens and saw that they were hiring. I just applied at their website, which tells me that I'm getting desperate.

Speaking of which, I should try to call Big Boss now.

11:52 a.m. - Thursday, Jul. 29, 2004



Thirty minutes past my bedtime. I got my homework posted on time, though. Yay me. I cheated and skipped graphing on Excel altogether, and just graphed on regular graph paper. Then I ran to FIL's to use his scanner. Yiii. I got my quiz posted last night on time too. Yay me again.

Had a busy, busy day. I'm exhausted. The house phone was cut back on last night, but I woke up to find my cell phone disconnected. Big Boss was going to call me this morning on my celly, but I didn't notice that it was disconnected until this afternoon!

So I promptly paid the bill and called her immediately. She was in a meeting so I left a message. This evening while we were running across town to scan my graphs, we'd left my cell phone at home. I got home to find that I'd missed her call, gah!

I'll have to stalk her first thing in the morning because I need to start working soon if she's going to hire me back. I applied at Holiday Inn and Ramada Plaza Hotel today just in case Big Boss tries to act the fool.

I got an email from That-woman-who-shares-my-name (academic advisor). I'd fired off the typical, ranty Moodymama email to her yesterday spewing word vomit about the math class from hell. I think she sensed my distress because she's telling me that I can take another 29 days off between this class and the next and it won't affect my Pell grant.

I'm having a genuine Moodymama crisis, which differs from the average person's crisis because it is overly dramatic and grandiose. Nevertheless, I'm glad to see that she acknowledges my neurosis and is willing to make accommodations. Maybe it's not so bad letting her share my name with me after all.

Good God, I'm never going to graduate at this rate. However, I'm thinking that the time off will give me a chance to adjust to working again.

I'm off to bed. I have therapy in the morning with my new, lovely therapist. Yay.

12:33 a.m. - Thursday, Jul. 29, 2004


Oh hell no.

What's Your Sexual Battle Cry?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

You've gotta be shitting me. I'm ashamed. I was thinking more like...a lion. Like a roar, not a meow!

6:07 p.m. - Tuesday, Jul. 27, 2004


Operation Damage Control.

I just got off the phone with Big Boss from my old job.

I told her that I was looking for something part-time at night (which I already knew she had open, thanks to Bev). She said that even if she hired me as a part-timer, I'd most likely have to start off with full-time hours. I'd also have to start off on the "shit shift" working Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in addition to two other nights during the week. I'm desperate right now and will take what I can get.

She said she'll have to review my personnel records before she can make a final decision. She seemed a little sketchy about the reasons that I quit, even though I tried to refresh her memory. I don't think it looks too good that I didn't give a two week notice. She's going to call me back this evening or tomorrow morning at the latest.

Just to be on the safe side, I wrote down five other places to apply at tomorrow that I saw in the Sunday paper. All of them front desk receptionist positions at hotels, which is odd because I rarely see these types of positions in the paper. Now all I have to do is get MIL to watch the kids for a whole day.

I also saw two human service positions at homes for wayward teenaged boys. Right up my alley, right? Unfortunately, T is dead set against me working anywhere remotely related to corrections occupations. He said that these positions are in reality what he does at the prison, only I'd be working with unruly, abusive, teenaged boys.

I'm trying to destress by keeping myself busy.

I might take a bubble bath with Monkey in a minute.

I checked my mail and found a lovely postcard from Mari. Thankfully, no bills were in the mail today.

On the plus side of things, I called the child support people to see what the hell was up with me not getting my checks. I haven't gotten one since April or May. They said that he was located again on July 14th, which tells me that he either tried to skip again or simply changed jobs. They're in the process of garnishment, so hopefully that means I'll be getting a check soon.

I hate how they won't tell me where he's working or what he does for a living. If I knew, I could get a better idea of whether I should be filing for a modification to increase. Like if he's working at Walmart then I won't bother, but if I know that he's working in plumbing or painting again then I might consider it. He used to make a lot of money as a plumber's apprentice and when he was a painter.

I'm going to splash in some bubbles with my baby. She makes me smile.

1:35 p.m. - Tuesday, Jul. 27, 2004


Stressed out.

I have a quiz due tonight, but I'm so stressed out that I cannot think.

Now I have an explanation for the extra money in my checking account this month...Bellsouth apparently didn't get the check that I sent from Hawaii. Now I'll have to pay an additional fee to get the phone reconnected. I still have to pay $35 for a DSL connection that I haven't used all month long, a connection that was loopy and not working when I got back from Hawaii. You'd think that they'd be nice and credit for me it or something. I'd boycott them if I could!

Maybe I'll just not reconnect it at all. I don't really need a damn phone anymore, do I? People will just have to call the cell phone and pray that I call them back. Or call me only at night and on weekends when I have more free minutes.

I wonder if I should call my mom and ask for money.

Maybe not.

Act like an adult, for crying out loud.

I don't handle financial stress very well.

I just know I'm going to flunk this quiz. Maybe I'll save myself the embarrassment and just not post it at all.

Maybe I should drop out of school and just get a full time job. If I stay in school I only want to work part time.

Maybe I should crawl under the covers for the rest of the day until Travis comes home and let him handle everything. Why do I have to worry about these things by myself? Asshole.

I wish my phone was working so I could call Emily.

1:01 p.m. - Tuesday, Jul. 27, 2004



I just discovered that my home phone is disconnected.

If I don't pay my cell phone bill by the first of the month, that will be disconnected too.

If I don't get a job soon, this will be disconnected as well.

I think I should call Big Boss now and see about that job.

11:52 a.m. - Tuesday, Jul. 27, 2004


A song.

Damn, I'm more competitive than I'd originally thought.

So I have to figure out the artist and the title of this song. Here's a little snippet of the lyrics:

After my picture fades and darkness has turned to gray,walking through windows, you're wondering if I'm OK...

It's an '80's song too. Somebody help me out!

7:26 p.m. - Monday, Jul. 26, 2004


Speak first, insert foot later.

It just floors me that the very people who yap incessantly about "being kind to others" and "being considerate" are sometimes the first to do the most rude ass shit.

5:15 p.m. - Monday, Jul. 26, 2004


Repression repulses me.

My song of the day: "Express Yourself" by Madonna.

I'm off to run errands.

12:53 p.m. - Monday, Jul. 26, 2004



I stole this from Miss Tania.

Rainbow: You have a chameleon aura. You know how
to adapt to your environment. You are usually
happy and few things in your life can change
this, at least not for very long. You love
life and all the challenges it has to offer
you. You are quite the enigma to other people,
but think you are really quite simple. You
could care less about money or material things
and, in fact, think they get in the way of

You sometimes suffer from insomnia.

Secret emotion: Confusion and Passion

What color is your aura?
brought to you by Quizilla

It doesn't really sound like me except for the insomnia part.

10:02 a.m. - Monday, Jul. 26, 2004


Let's start over.

Okay, Diary. This is my last update for today, I promise!

No more obsessing today.

I'm going to have a nice dinner with my family and snuggle with T while watching a movie.

Then I'll do some homework, take a bath, tuck the kids in, and go to bed at my newly designated bedtime. Like normal folks. Yeah, I want to be normal.

There will be no more discussions about lost opportunities and affairs that didn't happen and feelings for people outside of this union. Okay? Are you getting this, Diary?

There will be no more listening to songs about missing someone and thinking about someone you can't be with and all that nonsense. No more watching Lost in Translation types of movies and all that gibberish. Alright? Can you grasp that, Diary?

I'm turning a new leaf as of this very second.

Okay we'll start at 6pm on the dot so that gives me another three minutes for more obsessing.

Ready, set...go.

5:53 p.m. - Sunday, Jul. 25, 2004


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